I want to stick my p in your. b.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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