Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
