Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
