can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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