Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Randomize
