You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
