I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
