We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
