Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize