Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
