I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
