I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Randomize
