Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
