Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
