I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Randomize
