Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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