If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
How does one acquire holy water?
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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