I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
