I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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