belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i dont even know how to be here
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
