I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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