Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
