this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Randomize
