She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
