i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
