Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
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