I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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