I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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