Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
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