would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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