belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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