shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
