Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
he shaved USA in his pubs
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
