thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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