I just saw a hot homeless man
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
