you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
