: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize