Slut skills are useful in every country.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
