Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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