My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
