i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
last night I used snow as a chaser
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
