If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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