...so i touched it.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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