batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
