Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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