He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
