dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
