you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
