I don't remember. Are we still dating?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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