Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
